Did you know that another word for chronic is ‘inveterate’? Yet just as twins share many of the same distinguishing marks, they invariably are two separate individuals. And while you might entice me to conjecture that the three words, ‘chronic, inveterate, and invariable’ are synonymous to each other, I will hold firm in my opposed view. True, each word pays reference to a continuum, however, inveterate leans more heavily in the negative connotation of its definition than that of chronic, and invariably shows itself more like a cousin to the other two adjectives and less like the triplet I suggested it to be.
Why even allow myself this inconsequential diatribe? Because, words are important. And choosing them wisely is a tricky practice. Right now I am hung up on ‘chronic’. Let me explain…
I have not written a new post since last Monday. It was titled, “Telegrafico, Western Union”, and it was very short. Yes I put up a link to a song on Wednesday but I couldn’t write. I was plagued. I have been suffering with a horrendous headache since January. Now granted I am given a day or two or maybe even three of a reprieve, but I can tell it is the same headache holding its place in my physique because even on the days of rest, its presence winks at me. My worst day of suffering was on January 27th, the day before hosting an open house birthday party for my son, Cole. Thankfully I have amazing friends who pinch-hit for me and who stepped in to take on the pre-party chores, being I was rendered useless and connected to my icepack. And unfortunately for me, the acupuncture treatment I received on that Friday the 27th offered me not one ounce of relief from the migraine. Hither there to (sounds better than “needless to say”, though completely lacks sense), I have been on sporadic computer function for quite some time.
So last Thursday evening I played out the, all too familiar, scenario…me prone on the living room couch, an icepack wrapped around my eyes and forehead, the lights out, and all noise makers off–with the exception of one. A knock at the front door. A knock that aroused the instinctual sirens of alert which presently live in my home…the dogs lying on the floor next to me. It was our dear friend from England. He was in town for the weekend and had hoped to see Cole and offer him his good wishes in person. Now isn’t that a good dose of irony…he from out of the country, now in the country to see Cole only to find Cole out of the country…too situationally funny for words, though I try! Even funnier is that Cole happened to call right before the spontaneous arrival of our guest, so I was on the line with Cole when he came through our door. And the mere fact that Cole was finding respite outside our USA walls was encouraging news to our concerned Brit.
At any rate, I had no idea he was coming by, but as is customary with our ‘open door policy’, he knew he would be welcome. What he didn’t know is that he would be welcomed to me lying down in the dark with two very suspicious dogs at his ankles (well one really as the Piper dog wouldn’t get that close). Thankfully (for the both of us) Brian came home shortly after, allowing my return to the migraine regimen. However, upon his departure to the land of “Brian Bent” (aka the garage), he offered his condolences to me as he felt very sorry I had to suffer a “chronic condition”. There it is, the word…chronic. Up until he said that particular word, I merely dealt with the many headaches as a plague. You know, something that hits and then subsides. But chronic I hadn’t considered and the reality of that word being applied to my situation really stinks. Which is why I carry on and write nonsensical verbiage about word synonyms. I mean who wants to carry the label of “chronic illness”? Certainly not me, though sadly it is appearing to be more of the truth.
Alas, I have had to pull out of the acupuncture adventure due to an insurance loss, though I honestly feel I have pulled out too soon to render an opinion of its effectiveness (for my case). I remain sold on the effectiveness for my son, it has been miraculous in his recovery. And I had hoped, a little too much, that it would as quickly resolve my own inveterate condition.
Chronic, inveterate, invariable. Choose whichever one you want, for they are all riding my tail. It’s the eleventh plague. Perhaps I look Egyptian!
P.s. An addendum will come to this subject regarding methods of solving the migraine issue, for I have applied many. I don’t write them just yet as I am hoping to hear back from you, the reader, in the case a new possibility remains available. …a heart full of hope and a head full of pain, that’s me! 🙂
living in loss and gratitude 
I have hope and a prayer that the headaches go away.